I have not domesticated myself in this late era. Had it been the past I would have been murdered by those who desire conformity. Deep inside my head, I desire perfection, independence and creativity. However I’d rather gain money sooner than later, so that I can have what I want. So I have to pretend to obey.
And that is why I do other stuff instead of what I am told to do. Because I want to pretend to obey and get paid/graded, while doing what I want to do.
I seek out environments that are conducive to this. I now realize such environments are more important than my pay/grade. I shouldn’t have listened to my parents and gone after salary.